Monday, September 29, 2014


I had four babies (plus a miscarraige) in six years. I feel really crazy.

My brain functioning is incredibly slow. My friend Paul recently compared this feeling to dial-up internet. Downloading or uploading is like a never ending blinking arrow on a gray computer screen.

I recently spoke at a function where I totally, completely forgot what I was saying mid-sentence as I was passionately trying to make a dire point. I panicked. My face was hot flash red. Don't ever make me do that again.

I feel less like a "parent" and more like a "zombie." Seriously, there are times when I wonder if I will ever feel like I am a human being again. I am the undead. I am the half-living. I feel like I live in a constant state of brain freeze without the frozen confection in my hands. That's the worst part probably.

But anyway, it's worth it. Because, look! JUST LOOK:

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I mean, to trade a few brain cells for like seven thousand hugs a day? It's nothing to complain about.

To survive this hazy and frenzied life, I repeat to myself, I won't always feel this way. I won't always feel this way. I won't always feel this way...

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And if I am wrong, please don't tell me. Let me believe it's true.

Thanks Justin Hackworth for the photos.