Friday, September 17, 2010

Sick Kids Can Be Scary Part Two (the part I am not very good at)

Obviously my desire this week was to write about women I love, but my little Chief has been sick (as previously mentioned, thanks Chup) and my mind has been absorbed in his wellness, getting antibiotics to stay down in his body and playing musical beds at night. What started out as a high fever progressed to me finding a large lump in his shoulder which forced an investigation and thanks to a great doctor, ended in an ultrasound telling us that it's nothing more than an abscess which will (any day now) surface and drain. I hope you weren't eating breakfast when you read that last sentence. (Sorry.)

It's been interesting to see how Chup and I each handle a sick child. He is very proactive and faithful. On the other hand, I allow my mind to reproduce image after image of a grieving future, every fever and nose bleed and vomit is a sign of something far more serious. If I have a soft spot a sick child is it, which is why I've had to read my previous post about Ruth over and over again.I write these posts for my future self a lot of times.

In the middle of the night last night, holding my feverish boy it occurred to me that life will always come with its checkpoints. Times that make us stop and re-evaluate the strength of our faith and where we are along the path to joy. Last night it was abundantly obvious that I've got some work to do (as always) in keeping sight of my priorities. This evaluation was coupled with a strong sense that I am a child of God who loves every part of me and has entrusted me with eternal responsibilities. And then I realized how much I have been given for help along the way.

I brought The Chief into Chup for a priesthood blessing. Chup put his hands on that sweaty little head and blessed his body to sleep and heal, then he took him back to bed. I had to admit to myself that my worry was coming from my inability to accept that no matter what, I would always be supported by my Heavenly Father, in sickness and in health. Sometimes I forget.

I have also regrettably once again lost my goal to post every day until Christmas, but sometimes being a mother is more important. Did I say sometimes? I meant, being a mother is always more important. I am hoping that as my mothering progresses I will be more apt to contain my worried energy so that I will have some positive energy left over to propel me along. Also, I realize I can't schedule sickness, though wouldn't that be preferable?

In the meantime, there are posts I'd like to write about the women I love. I will get to those as soon as I can. It's nights like these I love being a blogger. So much to look forward to in the way of words and sentiments.

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AND . . . a Girls Day Out in Provo.

I am c jane and I keep thinking I am coming across overly dramatic. I blame it on lack of sleep and surplus of hormones. Like I always do.
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