Sunday, June 15, 2008

A Letter On Father's Day Night

Dear Blogworld,

This letter is just between you and me right? I mean, I need some procurement of confidentiality because it's not often that a certified Know It All like me asks for advice. Plus, I am totally embarrassed.

So, it is Father's Day and all day long people have been asking Chupa how it feels to be a grade-A, genuine, down-home Papa for real. His answers have ranged from funny to serious, but mostly I think he is quite pleased with himself. After all, slap some dark rimmed glasses on our child, plus some prolific facial hair and WHAM! You've got virtual, blood-sharing twins! Who wouldn't embrace their own mini-me?

But there might be one problem. See here, it is about me. I think that though Chup is grateful for my everlasting ability to nurture his child via my ample corporeal cafeteria, he might take issue with another of my mothering devices: my baby talk. I think it turns him decidedly off.

It is true since I've become a mother I can't help but raise my voice a couple octaves higher, coo at my baby and say things like "do we have poopies?" but except I sing the word poopies like they were poppies (garden variety!) Also, in the same helium-inspired voices I make up all sorts of silly nicknames for regular words so that sneezes are chickeezes and hiccups are now chiccups.

And I could go on.

Sure Chup uses his same regular voice to converse with our child. He even lets his voice sink a couple bars lower a la Barry White ("come on baby, you know you want me to change you.") Oh yes, Chup takes his fatherhood with a swallow of maturity and serenity. He doesn't purposely add or subtract consonants in conversation just to sound like a character in a Pixar film.

But I do.

Oh I do!

And I think I see Chup cringe every time it emerges from my throat. One time he left the nursery when I started to read Harvey Potter's Balloon Farm using nothing but my premium baby talk voice to our child. This obvious reaction has now made me paranoid about my baby talk and the stability of our marriage.

Please Blogworld, help a girl out. Do I quit the talk and save the marriage?

c jane