Around the Food Table

Dear Artist FormerlyKnown As CK,

I thank you for your friendship, and for sharing your wife with me, even into the wee hours at times. You two mean a great deal to me. I wish we all did more stuff together. Did you know that I think of you when I hear the song "Big In Japan"? I bet you were. You're big in Provo. Thanks for humoring my kids calling you "Sandwich" (I don't even know what that means), and for being so sweet to my family. We adore you so, and wish you a happy birthday. My gift to you is a recreation of one of my favorite interactions betwixt thee and me:

[scene: cjane's 30th bday party, towards the end of the evening, at the food table]

~j.: Well, this sure turned out nicely.

CK: Yeah, it did (crunch-crunch).

~j.: How are you feeling?

CK: Still sick. I can't shake this sinus crap.

~j. It's that season. Have you tried a sinus rinse?

CK: Um...

~j.: I use one and it works well. I don't know the name of it, but I'll find out.

CK: Okay.

~j.: Hey! You know those sheets you bought at Target?
CK: Huh? Oh, yeah!

~j.: Super cool deal. I bought a set, too.

CK: I couldn't believe what a great deal it was!

~j.: I know! A set of king-sized sheets for only $13? I'm kicking myself for only getting one set!

CK: You have a king? We don't...but it was still an incredible deal.

~j.: I had never spent under $45 for a sheet set before.

CK: I know! I thought maybe it was a mistake, maybe the price tags were wrong.

~j.: I know.

CK: But... What are we talking about?!

~j.: I have no idea.

[both walk away from the food table in opposite directions...and...scene]

Fondly,

~j5t