I'm Taking It All Off

When Chup and I got back from Vegas I was in full mope mode. I dragged myself to and fro, sipped from a large bottle of Perrier (no cups) and grunted until finally at the end of the day I succumbed to a clinical diagnosis: DEPRESSION.

"Look Chup, no more vacations for me. I can't take the aftermath."

But Chup just shook his head and walked away.

I think it all started on Friday night. I drove up to the high hills of IhavenoideawhereIwas with my dearest former mission comp Sister "There is sunshine in my soul" Heather to a Segullah retreat. Because we are Women of the Literary, we spent all night discussing verbs, nouns and when to use commas, a discussion so intriguing in fact, that Brooke and I spent all night and into the morning (5:10 am to be exact) arguing the use of acceptable alteration. At 5:50 am I awoke and left for home.

Two things about that night: I got to sleep in the same bed as my companion which is something I never got to do in Charny, Quebec and it was as wonderful as I had always dreamed. And two, I wanted to share a bed with all the Women of the Literary but as I discovered there is only so much of c jane to go around.

I raced home to make treats for my sister-in-law Megan's shower. I made little cookies that spelled B-O-Y because she is having a B-O-Y. Megan is one of those poor unfortunate souls that vomits everyday of her pregnancy (Page said "It's like Megan has had the flu since Halloween.") And the crazy thing is, Megan looks divine in her pregnancies. Her skin glows, her hair grows and she is down right sexy. Makes vomiting look like a good idea.

Yes? No?

Then an urgent message from Justine "I have Greek food for you. Call me honey." Justine had just returned from the retreat with some of Editor Kathy's homemade Greek food. People listen: I have had Greek food from here to Europe and nothing could possibly compare to the utter deliciousity of the delicately placed container of food I was dished out. I am so glad I agreed to do second drafts (I hate second drafts). Hummus like heaven. And when her baklava touched my lips I went into Nirvana and it is all true. All of it. As Matt would say, "I had a baklava-gasm."

I don't remember much after eating the Greek food. I just remember being very happy and Chup trying to take advantage. He asked for a Wii and I was like "Ssssssure Baby! Whateverrrrr you want. I am soooooo in love with you Baaaaaby!" That was good Greek food.

And then we went to Vegas.

Which brings me to my point. Depressive times call for depressive measures and that means that I am taking July off. I am going to party and stay up late and go to my new friend B.O.B's house and eat Kettle corn. I am going to let my room get really messy (like Chup's) and play with Nie and Nie's chillins and dance all night. I am going to go to Kelly's house for a weekly swim and continue my tan. I am not going to get uptight about e-mails or toenails or endangered whales. Do you hear me? Nothing is going to bring me down!

And I am going to blog about it all.


So stay tuned...

... and tell your mom to do the same.