What the Beep?

Late last night before I went to bed, Chupa asked me to recite my new 6 phrases. These are 6 lines that I need to use more in my life as it pertains to my serious incapability to let people down. You could come to my door and ask if you could throw sewer water all over my hard wood floors and I would probably agree. No doubt, I'd also help you carry buckets full from your truck parked on my lawn.

(Well, that sure was a strange example. But point made.)

So I started,

Me: (Deep breath) I don't want to.

Chup: Good

Me: I don't care.

Chup: Yes!

Me: (Building up steam) I don't know.


Chup is looking at his watch.

I am confused.

Where did that beep come from?

Me: I don't want to know.

Chup: Keep going!


Me: I don't understand.

Chup is looking at his watch intently.

Me: I don't believe you.


Chup: Aha! Lyle's RV is beeping every 30 seconds.

Me: What do you (Beep.) mean?

Lyle has an RV that he occasionally parks outside of his house. It's a fancy RV with your standard and pro-standard stuff like an after market spoiler and hydraulic Idon'tknows. He let me go in it once when he made it expand. It was like a cartoon! I was sitting on a chair, Lyle pushes a button, and suddenly I am slumped on a make-shift bed! Chair. Bed. Chair. Bed. 10 seconds. So I asked him,

"Does my weight expand when you do that?"

He looked at me from the rearview mirror and shook his head.

Silly East-side girl.


Looking at his watch, Chup holds up his finger and presses an imaginary button.


Chup: It must be an alarm system.


Me: That is annoying. It's like having the hiccups.

Chup: How am I going to sleep? Have you seen my Ambien around here?

Me: You take Ambien? Where did you get it?


Me: Nevermind. I don't want to know.

Chup: Ah! Nice usage.

Popular Posts