Tuesday, October 11, 2005

The Right To Shoes


My sugar daddy bought me some hot boots yesterday. I was so excited about them that I wore them to our family council last night. We only have family councils when one of our parents is running for office. This time it's my mom, and we we're like "O.K. how many fliers do we have to deliver and by when?" This is because my Dad runs for stuff a lot.
But back to my hot boots. Well, I waited for the perfect moment to unveil them in front of everyone. When we were done discussing what my mother's tagline should be (Topher wanted "Provote for Cindy") it got a little quiet. So I got up from the couch and lifted my pant leg while simultaneously and vigorously humming "Stars and Stripes Forever" and while I say humming it was more like "Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da" (yes, I typed those da-da's while pounding the tune out mentally).
Then Andrew said this very rude statement/question: How long do you have to wear those before you win the bet?
Some would be hurt, but not me. Not me for two reasons. Andrew, just older than me, has been dropping such sweet comments/questions, like the above, at me my whole life. And two, people are always making fun of my shoe preference. And while I use the term "making fun" I mean they try to sound genuine while their aura says "I can't believe you wear those."
About my pink rubber boots my boss said: Are you trying to be the feminine equivalent of Napoleon Dynamite?
About my brown leather "work it" shoes, one YW said: Look we have a cowgirl for YW President.
About my old stand-by's, black mary janes, my grandmother-in-law said: When I get to know you better I will tell you how ugly your shoes are.
Honestly though, it never occurred to me that I could be any other way. Blame it on my Grandma Marion whose taste in shoes has always involved sequins. In college someone from California asked me if I was Page's sister just because, as she said, no two people could possibly have the same shoe preference, such as ours, and not be related. Oh, and we also had the same voice. Steph has green Star Wars boots. Currently, we are arranging a time where our two boots can meet.
Just between you and me. I think people are jealous. They secretly want my shoes. Especially Andrew.