Saturday, October 29, 2005

BYU Cougar Math

Today I was called and chosen.
For the past 80 years, or something, my dad has had four front row seats, on the 40 yard line, in the LaVell Edwards Stadium. Years and years they have been occupied by my dad and 3 brothers. Every once and a great while there were open seats, but these tickets went fast -consumed by bigger Coug fans than I.
The boys in our family are favored. This, the girls acknowledge and are fine with because we married well. (In the future, we count on Lucy marrying well, especially because she only dates star athletes which has proven to be very resourceful thus far.)
But today. Today was different.
I have 5 brothers.
The eldest brother Steve is a coach for BYU. He was up in the booth, helping to call offensive plays. Smarty.
5-1=4
The second brother Matt cares more for "the hunt" than the "grid iron". More for hunting pigs than seeing the pigskin. All about the tackle in his fishing box, less about the tackle on the 3rd down. He went to the first 4 home games, but not now that there are fowl to be shot.
4-1=3
The third brother Christopher aka "The Jolly Porter" may not care for anything less than Cougar football. He probably spent the day making the coolest Halloween decorations for his house. He probably hates Cougar football. I don't know. He sure writes funny blogs though.
3-1=2
The fourth brother Andrew was there, as always. He goes like four hours early and wears a "Burn Your Canoe" shirt to every game. Steve all outfitted us with BYU t-shirts and whatnot. Not the BYU bookstore shirts, but the t's that the team is wearing. Christopher has an offensive lineman shirt that I wear sometimes and it goes down to my ankles. But back to Andrew, he is very fun to sit next to at anytime. He even had my seat all wiped down for me when I got there. He was very disappointed though that the marching band recycled the same half-time show as last home game. On the way home he was fuming "Some of those kids have a scholarship for the marching band! You would think they could come up with 6 original half-times! It KILLS me."
1 seat for my dad. 1 seat for Andre. 2 two go.
The fifth brother is Jesse. When it comes to Coug games he is a HUGE fan (see Andrew above) which is why it is so remarkable that he gave up his seat to study for the LSAT.
2 tickets taken. 2 tickets available.
The phone rang at 10:00 this morning to wake me up (yes, I am enjoying it). It was the phone call I had awaited, prayed and fasted for all season long. My mother and I were going to the Coug game. Nevermind that as I looked out the window it was raining a solid sheet of water. Indeed, Christmas had come early.
Christopher suited me up in his rain gear and off I went to cheer, sing "Rise and Shout" and eat stale chips without the nacho cheese.
This story is true: our tickets are right behind the visiting team. One of the Air Force defensive lineman started giving me "the look" throughout the game, as if to say "what are you doing little lady after the game? I've got a tendon that will need some tendin'... if you know what I mean..." Fed up, Andrew called the guy's name and pointed to my ring finger, sometime late in the fourth quarter. The guy went in on the next play and got a personal foul. Me and my sweet cheeks single handedly got BYU 15 yards.
Oh, and at last of all, I saw The Haka. No kidding, it brought tears to my eyes.









Go Cougs!